What about your friends?


“You should just sleep with him, then.”

This is a direct quote from one of my well-meaning friends. I was explaining my struggle of still being attracted to my ex but knowing that he wasn’t right for me.


Having a no- strings-attached physical relationship buddy (haha) might sound reasonable to a lot of people, but this girl can’t. This girl is trying (again) to keep all this awesomeness locked down for my husband (Johnny Depp, are you reading this?).

If I had taken this advice, I would have been walking right back to disaster. I would have been sinning against God and making life way harder for myself.

My friend didn’t get it.

When belief in God is absent, sin is no big deal. It’s normal.

I have relationships with peeps from all different backgrounds, belief systems, and sexual orientations, and I love and respect all of them. I will say, though, that it is important to have friends that love God. Like, really important.

Psalm 1:1 Happy is the man who does not walk in the way sinful men tell him to, or stand in the path of sinners, or sit with those who laugh at the truth.

As Christians, we need to take inventory of the people we surround ourselves with every day. Are they pointing us in the right direction or are they dragging us down? When we spend time with them, what does it look like? Is it honoring to God or will we likely end up on The Maury Show?

Drama, gossip, and unhealthy relationships do not make for uplifting friendships. We need people who will pray for us,  tell us the truth even when we don’t want to hear it, and who will encourage us to love God and love others.

I love being able to go to Tara or Mama Karen when I need to talk boys. I cherish having Debbie and Helen when I either need some truth or some wine and hummus. We all need people. It matters who those people are.

I am not saying to ditch your friends who don’t love Jesus. Love them and pray for them. They may be wonderful friends who only want the best for you. What I am saying is to weigh any advice against God’s word and be wise about who your closest confidants and counselors are.

Friendships are a blessing from God. Just be smart, because it’s way easier to fall than to pull yourself back up.


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