Do you know what’s fun?

Trying to make friends in your early-mid-late forties.

About fifteen years ago I was blessed with the most beautiful circle of women. We met at a thriving little church and before too much longer, we were basically family. Girls’ Night In every Tuesday at one of our homes where we shared food and laughter and sometimes tears. Mission trips and Bible studies and Sunday lunches and life: together. It remains one of the most cherished times of my life.

We were pushed even closer when the church we met at went through changes and those of us who didn’t feel called to be there anymore experienced significant church hurt. We formed a small house church and for a couple years it was just the warm, loving community needed at the time: a safe place with people who knew you and loved you anyway.

As time has gone on life has happened: marriages and babies and moves: many of us find ourselves worshiping in different churches on Sunday mornings. All good things, but consequently, our schedules and lives can tend to get full and we’re lucky to be all together once a year!

I am beyond thankful for each of these women. They have modeled how to love and obey God, gracious hospitality, and sacrificial generosity. They have shown up and helped me to stop being an idiot, and shown me what it looks like to keep going even when life is hard.

I miss that regular together-ness. I will hold a special place in my heart always. I’m happy I still get to see a few of them fairly often.

Fast forward to now:

Our family has been at a new church for about three years.

It’s well-established and it’s big. Not a mega-church, but you could slip in and out unnoticed for quite awhile if you wanted to.

People have been there since Bible times and it can seem daunting trying to enter into established friendship groups, but here’s the thing: if you keep showing up, you will eventually find your people.

Don’t fit in with one group? It’s ok. It may be a matter of different life stages or availability or a lack of appreciation for your slightly sarcastic sense of humor. Keep it moving.

Sometimes you have to be the initiator. And sometimes you’ll get turned down. Keep trying.

You may be the friend someone else is looking for.

A couple weeks ago, I hosted a small group of women at my house after Tuesday morning Bible study. As we ate and talked and laughed at the ridiculousness of pharmaceutical commercials, I was filled with thankfulness.

The friends around the table were new, but the camaraderie and connection felt like home.

God has once again given me the gift of community. Faith in Jesus gives a common ground; a foundation for deep relationship and growth as we strive together to know him and do what he says. These new friends make me laugh (most important), encourage me, challenge me, and accept my apologies when I put my foot in my mouth for the eighty-leventh time. Tuesday mornings are my favorite because we get to spend time together.

I’m glad I kept trying (and that others were doing the same!).

Christian friendship is such a blessing: a cozy fireplace and a cup of something hot and delicious in a world that can feel bitterly cold at times.

May we be the ones who hold the door open for others to come in.

Ang

“Make new friends and keep the old: one is silver and the other’s gold.”